Did you know that the meaning of the phrase "auld lang syne" is
(roughly) "times gone by"? That when we sing "We'll drink a cup of
kindness for auld lang syne" we are saying that we'll have a drink in
memory of old times? I didn't know the actual translation until just
now, having just just looked it up but like me, you may have previously guessed at the meaning from the
context of the song. It just makes sense. New years is traditionally a
time of reflection. As we look inward and think on the state of our
lives, we inevitably think about the things about ourselves we'd like
to change. In the best tradition of the holiday, we then set new year's
resolutions with the intention of changing ourselves for the better in
the coming year.
Despite everyone's best intentions, we all
know what tends to happen next. We give up on our resolutions (usually
sometime in February) and give up on changing ourselves until the
following year.
Though
people really do want the benefits they expect to gain from engaging in
new habits and behaviors-- In
the heat of the moment, when things get emotional or painful or
uncomfortable or inconvenient, people tend to just say "Screw it! This
is just too difficult" and they give up.
So, how does one go about setting a resolution that will stick?
Start by answering this question, "Is this the best time
for me to be making life changes?"
The next thing to do is to prioritize. Make your resolution be that you will take on only the one
most important self-help project right now.
The more personally motivated you are
to meet your task, the better are your chances of sticking with your
self-help project until you've achieved results.
Having settled on a single self-help goal, you next need to refine your goal so that it becomes realistic:
something you can actually accomplish. It is of no use to say, "I want
to lose weight", because that goal has no end specified. Implicit in
the idea of losing weight is that you will eventually arrive at a place
where you are done.
Some amount of research
on your part is generally necessary to figure out how you can best
address and meet your goal. You must figure out what methods are best
to use in order to accomplish your goal, and, as well, you must figure
out how you will measure progress you make towards meeting your goal.
As an example of the importance of selecting good methods,
consider that there are many different ways that someone can embark on
a weight loss project.
Having laid out the details of your plan, write them down
so that you will remember them. Write down your micro-goal, as well as
your starting point and the ending point that defines the moment when
you will have met your current micro-goal.
Post your written plan in a public place,
and generally announce to people around you that you are going to be
working on your plan. See if you can recruit them to help keep you
motivated and honest.
Measure your progress
towards your goal, and (if you can stand it) post those measurements in
a public place where people who care about you will see them. You can help make the work easier to accomplish by
nurturing your motivation to succeed. One of the best ways to do this
is to connect with other people who are working on
the same goal as yourself.
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Now a quick plug for an awesome site that has been a amazing source of inspiriation, knowledge and support.
